Things Miley Cyrus Won’t, But Should, Wear at Her Wedding

It’s been a mere 6 days since small Disney person Miley Cyrus announced her engagement via Twitter to hunky actor Liam Hemsworth. Chances are Cyrus, in a bout at womanhood, will wear something elegant and tasteful at her nuptuals. Lord know’s she’s already all grownsed up, as fabulously illustrated in the above Twitpic.  But there’s always hope — and ample precedent — that she won’t go the high road. So in case she wanted to indulge in inappropriateness, here are our suggestions. 

 

The White Trash
If we had our druthers, Cyrus would be rockin’ a stars-and-striped sequened gown. That’s probably why she didn’t call us for advice. Nevertheless, we have it for her. It’s a party in the USA with this red, white and blue sequined stunner, complete with a stars-and-stripes sash-tie in the back. All Miley needs now are some denim cutoffs and cowboy boots underneath, and we’re set for a real Nashville-style shindig!

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The Class Act
"Every Rose Has Its Thorns,” and so does this gorgeous confection from Elie Saab, with its lovely chiffon rose detailing along the hem and a shredded crinoline bodice, which is so Miley circa her “Can’t be Tamed” musical tour (sans faux garter belt stockings).

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The Ethnic

 

It’s been a hot second since we’ve seen Cyrus rock a bindi in ’10, but clearly the star still enjoys exploring Middle Eastern culture: she sports a tattoo of an evil eye on the index finger of her right hand and the word “karma” on that same finger. So, why not go ahead and don a full-out Indian wedding dress? Best of all, she’ll have the chance to expose that lovely midriff on her special day.

 

 

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The Bride at the Airport
Technically, this isn’t a dress suggestion, but considering Miley’s obsession with Uggs, it’s a no-brainer. A bride’s got to be comfortable running down the aisle, right? With the new bridal collection from Ugg Australia, the newly anointed Mrs. Hemsworth can keep her tootsies oh-so-cozy in the “Sparkles I Do!” sequined bridal boot, then throw on the “Fluff Flip Flop I Do!” for later.

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