After not admitting the real reason behind the Jim Henson Creature Shop Kids Meal Toys recall, gay-hating Chick-Fil-A has tapped the supposedly unaware Berenstain Bear fam for their latest Kid’s Meal prize. Ironically, the “toy” is a Berenstain Beared-up version of the Holy Bible, which teaches kids about the Golden Rule. (I guess they forgot about that othercommandment about lying. What heathens!)

If that wasn’t mind-bendingly paradoxical enough for you, then get this: on the Berenstain Bears website, the friendly foursome have posted this little tidbit to make sure no one gets their overalls in a twist:

Dear Friends,

Our publisher, HarperCollins, is marketing several of their Berenstain Bears titles through a kids’ meal promotion at Chick-Fil-A scheduled for August. This program was in development for over a year. We were unaware of any controversy involving Chick-Fil-A until July 25th.

The Berenstain family does not at this time have control over whether this program proceeds or not. We hope those concerned about this issue will direct their comments toward HarperCollins and Chick-Fil-A.

Sincerely, The Berenstain Family.

Translation: don’t go picketing and rioting outside our lovely treehouse in Bear Country, because WE HAD NOTHING TO DO with Chick-Fil-Cray! Now kindly leave us alone while we continue to scold our two bear children for eating too many teddy grahams, scratch our furry behinds and eat way too much honey for our own good.